One of my favorite aspects of growing up in Asheville was that we experienced four distinct seasons. When I grew up and lived in other parts of the country, I appreciated this distinction, and now understand that it matches my curiosity and excitement about what may happen next as change unfolds. My basic personality type seeks out change, and I look forward to the seasonal transitions as nature showcases something new in each one. As we enter the fall season, many of us become aware of the shifting feeling of a transition. It can show up as an uncertain rumbling of anxiety, or as excitement as the crisp fresh air replaces the summer heat. How do you handle transitions, whether it is the change of seasons, a new job or home, or a major life transition from a divorce or loss of a loved one? Our core personality may influence how we approach these chapters, and influence our coping ability.
There are two types of change: external (marriage/divorce, having children, moving, changing jobs) and internal (how attitudes toward change are shaped).
Change theorists surmise there are three stages of change (source):
Stage 1: grieving whatever you are letting go of
Stage 2: period of doubt and uncertainty, where most of the action is internal, i.e. how you’re processing the change
Stage 3: light at the end of the tunnel, where plans begin to take shape and action is ready to be enacted. This is the period where hope for a better outcome begins to take hold
Finding coping mechanisms helps with navigating transition, especially the big ones. (source)
- Expect a certain amount of anxiety or depression. Even positive changes often mean the loss of something in our lives, i.e. changing jobs means saying goodbye to coworkers we’ve come to think of as friends, buying a house or moving to another state could mean leaving behind a beloved home full of memories, or saying goodbye to friends.
Realize this is a new chapter. While acknowledging the losses is healthy, avoid living in the past, and this can be accomplished by thinking of the new thing as a fresh start.
Think positively about the transition bringing opportunity. The expression, “When one door closes, another opens,” may be clichéd, but it can also be true. Perhaps a career transition forced by a layoff can become an opportunity to learn a new skill to take your expertise in another, more exciting direction.
Avoid stagnation. The longer you take to get started on your new journey, the more chance there is to become inured in routine that feels comfortable but may not be very fulfilling
Have a support system. Going through change alone is daunting to say the least, but relying on friends, family, or counselors/coaches can help you maintain your momentum and move forward.
Make sure your expectations and timeframes are realistic. There will be difficulties associated with the changes, but taking them one at a time helps keep them from being overwhelming. Biting off more than you can chew is a quick path to giving up. However, by taking the change in manageable chunks helps you not only navigate the transition, but when you look back, you can see how far you’ve come. If you’re visual, make a list and mark how long the tasks take to do, and by the time you’re near completion, you can see how far you’ve come. For example, someone wanting to change careers may need a degree to enter the desired new field. That’s a big obstacle, but going about it one class at a time, they can manage it in smaller doses and before long, degree in hand, they can begin their chosen path and be proud of progress made.
At Earth Equity Advisors, we have noticed that our biggest competition is often not another financial firm, but inertia.
Some people explore responsible investing, yet feel overwhelmed with the thought of moving accounts and establishing a relationship with a new financial advisor. They may even cringe with they open their statement and see that some long-held investments do not match their values, yet making a change feels like it will take more energy than they can muster up.
At a recent conference, the keynote speaker referenced a psychologist’s statement that as consumers, our first decision to buy a product or service is from the right side of the brain---how it feels to us, rather than all the analytics of price, value, product quality, etc. that come from the left side of the brain. When it feels right to you, making changes and navigating the transition can feel empowering and positive.
Here’s to embracing change as we enter fall, and cheering nature as the leaves change color---they make transition look easy